Things To Do While On An Elevator...
- Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
- Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
- Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
- Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
- Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask: "Got enough air in there?"
- Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
- Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
- When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
- Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
- Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
- Meow occasionally.
- Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
- Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
- Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
- Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
- When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "Is that your beeper?"
- Say "Ding!" at each floor.
- Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
- Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
- Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and accounce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
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